The Abyss Stares Back

Apr. 8 - I got sucked into the Copenhagen Chainsaw Murder from sheer macabre interest. It happened to have made the news not long after I'd decided to kick Moron Abroad back to life by emphasizing local news and events, so I "reported" it. As the story got bigger and weirder, I followed merrily long. I began translating Danish news articles into English long before most English-language media were even aware of the case. As a result, I appear to have captured the fancy of some powerful search engines. Now people who claim to know Jared are suddenly commenting on the site. Maybe "Jaguar" partisans will start showing up as well. Maybe Crime Inspector Ove Dahl himself is lurking in the wings, resenting my mischaracterizations of his investigation and preparing a dossier against me for my deportation hearing. (Er... I think you're doing a great job, Herr Dahl, I just thought that first statement about the dismembered body parts suggesting talk of a crime was kind of funny.)

I'd like to get more deeply into this, but I have a business meeting this morning and since Molli's got to come with me—she's on retainer—it's going to take even more preparation than usual. (And yes, even in Denmark it's strange to bring a nine-month old into a corporate conference room for an actual meeting, but Io is a special company.)

2005, The Moron's Almanac™

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