BRIEF BRIEFING
Aftermath

Sept. 28 - It's Moon Unit Zappa's birthday. First name Moon, middle name Unit. Can you imagine what Frank Zappa would have gone through in Denmark?

* * *

Last night was completely hijacked by Molli, who experienced some kind of demonic possession from about six until ten. It seems strange writing that now and reflecting that it was only four hours—I can't even muster the hyperbole required to do the evening justice. Suffice to say I'm going to cut myself some slack and keep this pretty damn short.

* * *

Let me tell you what I learned in school yesterday.

The Danish word million means "million." Pretty sweet. One less word to translate. So obviously the Danish word billion means... "trillion." And the Danish word trillion means... "quintillion." The Danish word for "billion" is milliard.

To summarize:

1.000.000 = million (million)
1.000.000.000 = milliard (billion)
1.000.000.000.000 = billion (trillion)
1.000.000.000.000.000.000 = trillion (quintillion)

How can I be expected to live on a budget when I can't tell the difference between a billion and a trillion?

* * *

British history began on September 28, 1066, with the Norman invasion of England. The Normans were a group of Franks who'd grown weary of being so Frank. Their decision to become Normans cost them their Frankness, so they joined together and invaded England under the leadership of William (or, in Norman, "Norman") the Conqueror.

Prior to this invasion, Britain had been occupied mostly by Angles, Saxons, and large stones, who had never properly appreciated cricket, fog, or Kipling and had therefore been unable to invent England. William (Norman) the Conqueror realized that, if it was ever going to amount to anything, what England really needed was a Great King, preferably someone very much like himself.

Appropriate arrangements were made.

* * *

Today is the birthday of Mira Sorvino (1967), the aforementioned Zappa child (1967), Janeane Garofalo (1964), Brigitte Bardot (1934), Marcello Mastroianni (1924), Al Capp (1909), and Ed Sullivan (1902).

It's Teachers Day in Taiwan and Flag Day in Thailand.

Happy Tuesday!

2004, The Moron's Almanac™

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