The Moron's Daily Briefing

Dec. 4 - Francisco Franco was born 110 years ago today.

Franco graduated from the Spanish military academy at Toledo and became the youngest major in the Spanish army at the age of 23. By the age of 34 he was a general, and by 41 he was Commander of the Spanish Army.

Eager for war but lacking an enemy, the ambitious young Spanish commander-in-chief declared war on Spain in 1936 and defeated her in just three years.

The war was so successful and exciting it inspired World War II, and Franco's rise to power foreshadowed the ascension of other evil bastards in Europe.

After his victory Franco named himself "Generalísimo" ("villainous bastard") to better distinguish himself from the "Fuhrer" ("maniacal bastard") and "Il duce" ("vicious bastard").

Franco ran the country until shortly after his death in 1975.

General Franco is still dead.

Marisa Tomei is 38 today. She shares her birthday with Tyra Banks (1973), Jozef Sabovcik (1963), Jeff Bridges (1949), Rainer Maria Rilke (1875), and Wassily Kandinsky (1866).

Today is Tupou I Day in Tonga. (There is no Tupou II Day.)

© 2002, The Moron's Almanac™

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