The Moron's Weekend Briefing

Aug. 16 - It's more or less the middle of fucking August.

And it's hot.

So forgive me if I don't give a damn about the start of the Klondike gold rush (8/16/1896), the joint birthday of Frank and Kathie Lee Gifford (8/16), or the birth of Davy Goddam Crockett (8/17/1786).

Please also excuse my lethargy while I note half-heartedly that it was eleven years ago (8/18/91) that communist hard-liners in the Soviet Union relieved President Mikhail Gorbachev of his duties.

Gold. Birthdays. Communists. I mean, when it's this hot out, who really gives a damn? Not this moron.

I'm listing birthdays and holidays and then I'm outta here.

In addition to Frank and Kathie Lee, August 16 is also the birthday of Angela Bassett (1958), Madonna (1958), James Cameron (1954), Eydie Gorme (1932), Charles Bukowski (1920), and Menachem Begin (1913).

August 17 is the birthday of Sean Penn (1960), Robert De Niro (1943), V.S. Naipul (1932), Jiang Zemin (1926), Maureen O'Hara (1920), Mae West (1892), as well as the aforementioned Crockett.

August 18 is the birthday of Christian Slater (1969), Patrick Swayze (1954), Martin Mull (1943), Robert Redford (1937), Roman Polanski (1933), Rosalynn Carter (1927), Shelley Winters (1922), and Virginia Dare (1587).

August 16 is Assumption Day in Acadia, National Restoration Day in the Dominican Republic, and Franz Josef II's Birthday in Liechtenstein.

August 17 is Jose de San Martin's Death Day in Argentina, and Independence Day in both Gabon and Indonesia.

August 18 is National Bad Poetry Day in the United States.

Have a cool weekend.

2002, The Moron's Almanac™

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