DAILY BRIEFINGThe Moron's Daily Briefing
Aug. 14 - 102 years ago today the western powers quelled the Boxer Rebellion in China. In the clearing stood the Boxers, fighters by their trade, and they carried the reminders of every glove that laid them down or cut them til they cried out, in their anger and their pain, they were leaving, they were leaving, but the fighter still remained.
Unless that was Simon and Garfunkel, in which case the Boxers were bitter, out-of-work Chinese boxers who didn't think the western powers should be allowed to control China's ports, despite the fact that everyone knew China was a poor backward country without any modern conveniences.
Emboldened by the belief that their magical boxing powers made them invulnerable to bullets, they demanded that westerners get out of China or die.
Westerners refused to get out. They crushed the rebellion, and boxing remains a neglected sport in China to this day.
Eleven years ago today, scientists reported that a worldwide band of volcanic dust from the eruption of Mt Pinatubo, in the Philippines, could be cooling the world's climate. Hence this summer's cooler temperatures.
Today is the birthday of Earvin "Magic" Johnson (1959), Gary Larson (1950), Danielle Steel (1947), Steve Martin (1945), David Crosby (1941), and Russell Baker (1925).
It's Independence Day in either the Democratic Republic of the Congo or the Republic of the Congo. (They'd be even more independent if they delineated their names a little better.) It's also Allegiance Day in Morocco and Independence Day in Pakistan.
© 2002, The Moron's Almanac